Psalm 139:10 “Even there your hand shall lead me, and your right hand shall hold me.”
After my son was born, I went through an unexpectedly dark season. In a time of immense joy, a dark fog descended on my heart as I battled postpartum depression. I remember feeling the isolation of it all as it took me further and further into shame, guilt, and fear. Each day, I felt like I was on a journey with twists, turns, and detours no one else would be able to follow. Even I could not tell what was going on inside my own head.
I remember how hard it was for me during that time to find the words to pray. But, I pleaded every day during that time to God saying, “Don’t let go of me. Keep hold of me. Hold on to me.” I prayed variations of this when I was at a loss for words. There were times when my fears tried to convince me that maybe I was too far gone or out of reach. The enemy loves to latch onto thoughts like these to deepen the depths of the darkness we feel while clouding our eyes to the truth of the light waiting to be revealed.
But as we read Psalm 139, we see that we are never far from God’s presence. Our painful circumstances and heartbreaks never take us down a path that God cannot pursue us on. No matter where our journey takes us, no matter how dark it seems, we can remember this: “Even there your hand shall lead me, and your right hand shall hold me” (Psalm 139:10).
God’s strength and compassion are described so beautifully in this verse. He will lead us. He will hold us. In our hardest moments, they are often two of the things we need the most. We need him to guide us when our strength fails and we are stumbling around in the darkness of our circumstances. And we need him to hold us as our loving Father, able to empathize with our pain and comfort us in a way no one else can.
There was nowhere that I could go, even in my lowest lows, that God would not be there to lead me, to hold me, and to guide me. And there is nowhere that you could go, that he would not be able to lead you and hold you too.
God delivers us out of hard seasons. Even when we can barely find the words to pray or the will to keep moving, he is always moving in and through us.
Our lives will take us into seasons that we never expected and could have never prepared for. But, they will never take us anywhere that God cannot go alongside us. He is there, holding you close and overflowing your weary heart with his strength to lead your way.
Are you in a season of immense grief? Even there, his hand will lead you. Are you in a season of transition and uncertainty? Even there, he will hold you. Are you in a season where you feel isolated by the enemy and further away from God than you have ever been? Even there, he is with you.